All that can change in a weekend (Blaine)

First of all I want to say that I don't mean to push Mom's great post down so (relatively) soon after she posted it. The BAWB has had nothing on it for weeks, months even, and as soon as someone writes something she gets booted from the top straightaway. Sorry, Mom, but you inspired me.

Next I would mention how crazy it is how much things have changed in the few short days since Mom wrote her post on Friday. There are no longer any question marks with Grandma's health, with Dad's potential job, or with whether Mom will be running outside for the rest of the season or if more snow is to come. All of these things have played out and here we are on the other side, trying to make sense of it all. To take things in the opposite order of how I listed above, here are some of my thoughts:

It snowed today. Right when we thought (hoped!) that maybe we just might be lucky enough to start deserving some warmer days. At one point I was slated to go night skiing this evening with Clay and some of the Winder cousins but cancelled that when I didn't have time to arrange skis and when I realized that I would be taking Friday off and it wouldn't be a good week to have other short days.

On Dad's job. He told me Friday night that he had found out that the job wasn't going to happen. I was on my way home from meeting with the Dean of BYU's law school who had informed me that I was accepted into their school but hadn't mentioned any scholarships. I can only imagine how ungrateful and spoiled it must make me sound, but I have to confess. I realized as I ended that meeting how much I had gotten my hopes up that he was meeting with me for something more significant than just acceptance. I am ashamed to admit it but I had a hard time not feeling really disappointed that there wasn't a scholarship of some kind built in. Not that I really deserve it, but I had had enough good news that I had begun to feel pretty confident. Anyway, as I felt like I was "crashing down" from my lofty hopes to a harsher reality, I talked to Dad on the phone and found out that he had not "been accepted". We talked about some of what may have gone wrong, what regrets he had or what he may have done differently if he could do it over. It was an interesting conversation to have at that moment for me. I felt like I had been humbled and brought down to earth but talking to Dad suddenly put me in my place. The man has worked more hours in the last few years than any of us besides maybe Mom even realizes. And so much of it isn't work work, but service work. He gives nearly all his time to others, always with such strength and optimism. Then he lost his mom the same weekend that he got shut out from his reach for the lifeline that this new opportunity may have presented. And here I was, riding home, feeling disappointed that the opportunity afforded me at one of the ten schools I applied to was only good, not great. Anyway, I just want to say that our thoughts, our prayers, our hopes, and our support in any way we can give it is here for you, Dad. This has to be a hard time for you but you never show it. Because that's not your way. You are an amazing example of manhood, of fatherhood, of service, and of faith. Thank you for that and may the Lord bless you in these trials.

Finally, a few thoughts about Grandma. It actually surprised me how emotional I was on Monday, the day after. Grandma's was the first death I have experienced where I had held her hand, talked to her, and actually gotten sensible responses back on the same day that she passed. Grandma was Grandma, as far as I ever saw her, until I squeezed her hand and said goodbye. I told her thank you for all that she had given us. She said "Now you just have to stay true to it." Sunday night we got the text from Dad that she was going to her home. The night was fuzzy. The next day was sad. My thoughts kept returning to grandma. Not the grandma in the hospital but, for some reason I can only guess, to the grandma who stayed with us when I was 8 and Mom and Dad went on a cruise. She and her mother (Grandma Remington) stayed and watched us for a week. It was the first time I really got to know either of them, since they had previously just been, respectively, Texas grandma and Idaho Grandma. I remember they helped me practice the piano and learn the songs. I couldn't have been in lessons for more than a few months but I remember them listening to my little tunes as I played them out of the green Schaum Primer and singing along with the corny lyrics to help me. I remember there was a new note, the C above middle C, that I had never seen before. They helped me count up to it and find the right note. Things were different with both of them after that week. They still lived in Texas and Idaho but now they were real people to me. So I sat there yesterday, wondering why that memory was what kept coming into my mind yesterday, out of all the memories that I have of Grandma. All I can figure is that that memory stands out because it was so different from all the others. It is one of the few one-on-one moments I can recall with grandma. Sitting there on that piano bench together. Some people nurture one-on-one relationships. Grandma Bassett, for all her strengths, however, was not a one-on-one grandma. Grandma didn't need to be alone with you to make you feel special. She could do it with a look and a snarky remark from across the room. Grandma was much more comfortable one-on-one-hundred. She knew how to be the center of attention; she knew how to blend in and enjoy being one of the crowd. But crowds were her thing. Big, loud groups of people were where Grandma felt at home. I think it was fitting that her hospital room was not a quiet or solemn place during her final hours. It was not a one-on-one bedside situation. It was a party, a crowd, a shouting match, practically, all the way until the end.

Thanks again, Grandma, for everything you've given us and taught us. Thanks for starting the party, we'll be sure to keep it going until we see you again.

It's Never Too Late (mom)

Dear Family,

I could start by telling you how sad I feel that we haven't been keeping up on this family blog lately, or I could just tell you how I know everyone is really busy and that I think we all have lots of love for each other and good intentions and that I hope we can do better in the future. It's never too late to change and do better. I hope everyone will feel the need to write and share in 2011!

I'm tempted to tell you what Janey and Max are up to, since they live at home, but I shall overcome that temptation and write only about dad and I.

Dad's is as swamped as ever at work. There are days when I go downstairs to visit with him and I can tell that "OVERWHELMED" is the word of the day. He is such a great example to me because he just hangs in there thru the pain. I don't tell him often enough how much I love and appreciate him for that. I think most of you know that he has interviewed with the Church media department (where Stef's dad works.) Dad had a lengthy phone interview 2 weeks ago and this past Tuesday was invited downtown to interview with three people. The rest of the day he kept telling me interesting things from the interview. I think what stood out to him most was how formal the culture of the COB (Church Office Bldg) is and how he has never worked in an environment where everyone dresses up. They were in the process of interviewing so he has no idea whether or not he will get the job, but it certainly was an interesting experience. We keep praying that if it is right, something good will happen. We have no idea on salary at this point, in case that passed your mind.

Dad is also in the middle of Ward Conferences. He started last Sunday with our 2nd ward. He gave a great talk. Our stake has a theme each year (temple, family history, missionary work, etc.) This year our theme is on finding joy and happiness. I'm sure he will share his talk.

We have both spent plenty of time at IMC hospital visiting grandma Bassett, including several sleepovers. Just yesterday grandma was moved from the IMC Heart and Lung Center where she has been for 10 days, to a transitional facility where she can spend up to 20 days (that is what insurance will cover) She has a private room and can have visitors 24/7. Aunt Jill is still in town but I think that is coming to an end very soon. Jill has been with grandma almost constantly so it is going to be hard when Jill goes home. We are not sure what the future will bring. Grandma is trying to have a good attitude, though she would rather be in her home. She is on oxygen and we worry about fluids building up again, which seems to be a big part of her problem. In case you want to visit she is at: Aspen Ridge (sounds like a ski vacation huh?)5323 South Murray Road (that is 7th West on the northeast corner of 53rd and 7th west behind the Conoco gas station) in room 215. It is a very nice facility.

Other things in my life include my daily runs (I have been running outside again which I prefer to the treadmill), my regular Thursday cleaning, being 2nd coun in Primary (I love that calling), donating blood (Janey and I went yesterday and we are really proud of ourselves) and helping the sister missionaries. I not only feed them sometimes but they call me often to go on teaching appts with them. That is been really interesting. I don't miss driving carpool every morning now that C&K have a car. I do miss visiting with the kids though.

So that is life and I better quit or this will be too long to read. I would love to hear ANYTHING that anyone wants to share.

Love, Mom